Removing Toxic Friendships From Your Life

Monday, 30 November 2015

One thing that you seriously need as you grow older is a strong support network. You need those people that you can turn to for support, that you can trust, and that pick you up when you are down.

I've found, over the past year or so, that some friendships are not as friendly as I once believed. I admit, it took me a while, and looking back at some now I do wonder why I believed for so long that they were good for me, but I guess that I am still growing up, and what is growing up without learning along the way?

We all fall into a trap of calling people 'friends' when really they're not that at all. It's just easier to refer to people as a friend rather than 'somebody that you used to get along with but turned out to be a bit of a knob', isn't it? We all do it - don't you worry.
But I think we should all realise that it is okay to not call somebody a friend, especially when they're not. It's important to remove certain people from that category in your life, because it should be saved for that support system I mentioned above, not for people that don't quite slot in anywhere else but in the 'somebody I was quite close to once' category.

Over time, people change. YOU change. Everybody changes at their own rate, they change because of things that occur in their lives, because of the new people that they associate with, or just generally within themselves. People don't change together, and that's okay. Not everybody can change alongside friends that also change, and still be happy and compatible - the ones that can are lucky, but often, it doesn't happen like that.

With some friendships, it's easy to say goodbye due to mutual understanding that time together isn't as enjoyable as it once was, or that your lives have taken different routes, and that's okay. It happens every day. But some people are unaware of when to say goodbye, when it's best to drift and when friendships become toxic.

Toxic friendships are the ones where you become exhausted whilst spending time with them. The ones where you'd rather just be alone, or just with somebody else in general. The ones where you find yourself making excuses not to hang out with them because you just can't deal with them anymore.

Whether they are constantly negative, constantly talking about themselves, selfish, unsupportive, completely unaware of your feelings, or just generally a draining person to be around - you need to back away. No person should get the best of you if they don't deserve it.
Whether it's time apart or cutting out completely, allow yourself a break from that person and you'll feel some part of you positively lifting from the release of the pressure of attempting to keep that friendship running smoothly, and make way for those people that keep you positive and happy.

Because those friends that keep you positive and happy make everything better and make you wonder why you wasted so much time with other people in the first place.

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